Wednesday, March 14, 2012



We're in the heartburn- and waddle-inducing huge belly homestretch of this pregnancy now. By the end of the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament, I will surely be crying "Uncle!" as I wait out the last few uncomfortable weeks in the baby countdown.
On the plus side for this pregnancy: I've felt pretty the whole time and have now had the experience of people telling me I look great during pregnancy. I was definitely not the cute pregnant lady in the last two pregnancies, so this is a novelty. My wedding ring still fits and it's been easier to control my weight this time around. I've also found that the way this baby's DNA mixes with mine has made me a bit more ummmm....assertive throughout the pregnancy. I have to say I like this take-no-guff or prisoners enhancement as much as I enjoyed the way being pregnant with Charlie made me mellower. Our children give us so much right from the start.
On the minus side: I've never really had a point where I've felt good during this pregnancy. Although all tests show mom and baby are completely healthy, it has been a physical chore to carry this babe.
In the last few weeks we've laid in the few extra supplies we need for our new gal or guy, and soon I'll be sending my boys digging in the upstairs closets for the rest of the feathers for my nest. The eagerness to get to know this little one on the outside is ramping up daily.

(This is the proof that Josh took these pictures because no one else can make me laugh this hard)

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Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Number Nine


I gave birth to my first baby nine years ago today. In the intervening years he has developed into a deep-thinker and a deep-feeler. He is my absent-minded professor and my philosopher-prince. Sometimes I get frustrated with him when he has a lost another pair of gloves or doesn't listen because he's lost somewhere in the ether. But when he returns and says things like, "If the aliens were smart, they would attack the earth now before we have the capacity to fight them off," or "If you die and you live alone, what happens to your stuff?" or "I think New Zealand should be its own continent," I fall in love with that amazing imaginative mind all over again.

Sometimes his feelings get him in trouble because the world isn't really set up for people who feel things as deeply as Ellis and he hasn't mastered the defense mechanism of hiding things inside that seems to be a requirement to make others feel comfortable. Sometimes those feelings are hard, like when things are "Unfair!" But mostly those feelings are reflected in an enormous capacity to love, like when he gently talks Charlie through not being scared in the shower or shows him a new game or fixes him breakfast even though Charlie can be really annoying and gets everything his way. I hope one day Charlie and Ellis's other younger siblings realize their luck in having such an excellent big brother.

The key to Ellis is taking time to build a relationship of trust and respect with him. The work will be rewarded with entrance into the magical world he spins and the giving heart he has. I delight in each passing year with him because it means we are getting closer to fulfilling our dream of traveling the world together (First destination: Japan - because he loves Nintendo and I love sushi), and because as that mind and heart grow in capacity I feel like knowing Ellis is a great adventure in and of itself.
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