Wednesday, January 26, 2011

A Marriage


I don’t have a single photograph of our wedding day on January 26, 2009. I forgot my camera when we left for the Ramsey County Courthouse. The temperature was below zero and Charlie was sick, throwing up on me at least three times that day. It was appropriate because we didn’t want our wedding to be a big deal. We chose a Monday in January and wore clothes that were already in our closet. The only thing nearing significant about the day was that it happened to be Chinese New Year – the Year of the Ox, which is my sign and a good solid down to earth one at that.

If I had one word of advice about marriage I would say to marry someone you can do hard things with. There are many people in the world with whom you will enjoy spending time, but for running the great machine that is a family, pounding out the miles of everyday life, and dealing with the times when things go really wrong you need someone you can trust implicitly to stick with you with an unwavering steadfastness and shared commitment. If we had written our own wedding vows, Josh and I would have promised each other a life of squalor and misery and pledged to always fight back to back. I know that when I fall apart, he’s got it covered, and I also know that I will dig down deeper into my well of resources to make sure I’m doing my part for him. Because of this, I believe, we laugh more frequently, savor the deliciousness of simple joys, and want to be home more than any place else. Because we are focused on giving everything that we are to each other, we get more out of our relationship than anything else.

Happy anniversary to my husband, my best friend, and the only person in the world who never sucks.

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